A calmer version of me

Okay, so here's the deal. I wrote a post, and then decided against posting it. Now that the craziness has been transferred to a post that will never be published, I can write a more logical one.

I am tired. I am upset. I am so done with picking up the pieces all the damn time. And I'm not doing it anymore. I'm not.

All week my husband has felt like crap because he isn't controlling his diabetes at all and it's wearing him out. I have lost all sympathy for him because he doesn't even try to control it, so as far as I'm concerned, it's his own fault.

But this means he is sleeping ALL THE TIME and that leaves me to pick up the pieces with the kid and the animals and the house and every other thing that needs to be done. I just cannot do it anymore.

As I do, I am making a list. Because everything is better and easier to deal with when in list form, right?

1) Make a list - check!
2) Hang up shelves for Dvds. They are currently stacked on our fireplace top, which is in my direct line of view every time I'm downstairs and they are slowly driving me nuts.
3) Do a serious weeding of K's toys and books. Chica has too much stuff, and some of it HAS to go away because I spend too much time picking it up (She does try to help me, but she's 2)
4) Do a serious weeding of all of my stuff. I too have too much stuff and it's slowly suffocating me
5) Take 10 minutes a day to work-out. Even if it's doing jumping jacks, or pushups, or crunches, do something. I feel better when I do something, I just forget that when I don't.

Making the deck prettier and safer

A short little product recommendation post. Behr did not give me any free products or pay me in any way for this (because I still haven't figured out how to tap into the "give me free stuff that I need and I'll blog about it" market.

Our beautiful 2 story deck was one of the things that I loved the most about our house, but it's starting to see some wear and tear. The poor steps are exposed to the elements all the time, and it's starting to show. Last year I stained and sealed the heck out of them, and by the time this spring rolled around they were cracking and dry once again. Especially with Bug wanting to walk up and down (and up and down, and up and down) them, we had to do something.

May we bring to the stage, Behr DeckOver, in Silver Gray

I love this stuff! It is decently priced (about $35 a gallon) and we were able to do 2 coats of the stairs with just one can. It was a bit tricky getting it on because it's so thick, but wow is it some awesome stuff. I finally found the best way to put it on was to use an edger tool for painting and spread it over the step, then use a short bristled paint brush to get into all of the cracks.

Ta-da! It looks great with our Trex deck and is super smooth for the feet. We are planning on doing the railings of the entire deck with it as well, eventually.

 It does definitely look like you have a painted/plastic surface though, so if you want the wood grain to show through, this is not the product for you.

Big girl room

Some updates to Bug's big girl room (aka, a constant project in progress lol). She asked for more butterflies to go up, so she now has a flock (herd? group?) of butterflies going up the wall with her closet. Never mind the flower on the door, it's getting moved. 

She also loves her pretty pink dreamcatcher above her bed.

The glittery pink letters have returned. I love how they stand out against the gray walls.

I made her a board for pictures, cards, etc. This was hanging on her wall before with kitten fabric and all of her baby shower cards, but I thought I would grow it up a bit for her.

I just used leftover cardboard, some scrap fabric I had, quilt batting I had leftover from a project, ribbons, and beads.

 The beads were a royal pain in the rear. I had no brads or other way of attaching the ribbons to the board so that it made the essential puckers, so I just sewed the beads through. It took for-e-ver. but came out beautifully.

Bed-sharing to the big girl bed.

My little girl is growing up, and that means making the dreaded transition from bed-sharing to her big girl bed. Bug hated her crib from day one, and refused to sleep in it. It didn't matter how asleep she might be, happily snoring on my lap, the second her body hit that crib she was up! I tried it all, warm blankets, inclined mattress, sound machines and all. Nope, nada, not happening.

So she slept in a Fisher Price Rock N Play next to our bed for 7 months, at which point she was able to crawl out of it and we were left with the option of moving her into our bed, or trying the crib again. First, we tried the crib again, and did not sleep. After 2 nights we decided to buy a King sized mattress and move the Bug in with us.

Now, we heard it all, from everyone. "Bed-sharing is dangerous" "She'll never leave!" "But when will you and your husband have time for yourselves?"

But I did my research. Bed-sharing is not dangerous IF you do it correctly. Yes, that's is right, there is a correct way and an incorrect way. If you cannot follow the guidelines for bed-sharing safely, then don't do it.

The third issue was a non-issue because my husband and I never had any time for ourselves anyway. My butt was so exhausted that I was asleep by 8pm most nights (or as soon as the kid went down) and he works such odd shifts that some days he's still at work until 11pm and others he's waking up at 2am to go in.

I confess, I was worried about the second point. "She'll never leave" but not worried enough to not do it because I was tired and she's a really good snuggler.

But, the time came when I started wanting my bed back, and she seemed like she was getting ready to go out on her own. So we bought her twin bed (which is PERFECT for her, she can easily get in and out but has enough room to flop around) and made a big deal about her picking out her comforter. 

*side note - I was totally not into bringing character bedding into the house yet, just because. The kiddo went straight the Little Mermaid bedroom set and was unwavering in her request for "Ar'el pease, mommy!" so Ariel it was.

The first day we had it, she happily napped in what is now known as her Ariel bed.

But it was the middle of June, and we would be leaving in a few weeks for a family vacation where we would once again be bed-sharing since there was only one bed for us. We got back from vacation and I said, "okay, we'll take a week to adjust and then start moving her."

I thought it was going to be a battle, because that's all I had heard from others. Do you know what happened? The second day we were home Bug goes, "Mommy, Baby sleep in Ar'el bed, okay?"

Oh...um..oh...okay. And we tucked her into her Ariel bed, and she never looked back. Two weeks later and she happily naps and sleeps in her bed, and wants nothing to do with our big bed. I'm still adjusting to her being in another room (it's only across the hall but it feels so strange not to hear her breathing next to me) but I couldn't have asked for a better experience.

A butterfly/Little Mermaid party

So...I've been a little MIA lately. I know, I know, what else is new, right? But I have a good excuse this time! Two actually.

The first is that I've been super busy with the release of my second novel, Heart of Kylassame, which went live two weeks ago and I've been doing a ton of promoting, selling, and mailing.

The second, is that yesterday was my little Bug's 2nd (2nd?!) birthday and it took me a while to prepare everything. Unfortunately my husband drew the worst schedule possible the week of her birthday ( gone until 7pm every day except Friday, when he was gone until 10:30pm, party was Saturday), but I had a ton of help from my parents, so it all turned out fabulously!

This year's theme was Butterfly, because 1) the kid loves them and 2) I could re-use her "Bugs and Berries" stuff from last year. Then my husband came home 24 hours before the party with a bunch of little mermaid stuff. Not a happy camper right here, not a happy camper. But that's okay, we made it work. We'll just do a huge Little Mermaid party next year! (And that was the worst part, after I got over being pissed I thought of a ton of awesome ideas for a LM party. Ah, next year!)

Oh, and the best part? Almost ALL of the butterfly stuff came from our local Dollar Store. Woot! I think we spent, maybe, $40 on all the decorations, and $30 of that was the Little Mermaid stuff (which was not from the Dollar Store)

Guests got to partake in the some chips and dip at the Little Mermaid table. I just went with Tostitos and Salsa and Tostitos and Queso this time, as very few people went for the cream based dips last year and I don't like them as well.

Then we had the drinks and favors section. Each of the kids got a slinky, bubbles, stickers and some candy. you can also see some of the beautiful artwork that my friend Red gifted to my Bug when she was born.

A crazy dark image of the food spread because I am a camera moron and didn't realize I had the flash turned off.

Oh, look, now I figured it out and turned it on (yet didn't take a big pic again...)

Our lovely fruit cups. We had a mix of watermelon, grapes, strawberries, blueberries, and kiwis.

Close up of the fruit.

Little Mermaid Cupcake stand. The cupcakes were a chocolate GF mix with Cream Cheese frosting. Num! You can also see my veggie tray as well as the wrap sandwiches we bought from Costco

Then we have some yummy meatballs. Thank goodness for Pinterest steering me over to Gimme Some Oven for the recipe. Delicious!

We made a little balloon ceiling thing and hung up a happy birthday banner.

And another Happy Birthday banner in the other room (from Dollar Store)

The veggie tray (before the Ranch was put out)

And my slightly creepy butterfly cake. Creepy, but omg was it good. Yellow GF cake with a super delicious and easy frosting. Just mix 1 C whipping cream with 1/2 C Cream Cheese Frosting. Just run the whipping cream in the mixer until it stiffens up, then add the Cream Cheese Frosting. Perfect blend of sweetness and fluffyness and soooo good. Obviously, I will not be quitting my day job, or my author gig to go into cake baking lol.

The butterfly plates and matching utensils, all from the Dollar Store (minus the colored cups, those were from our local grocery store)

There you have it! I had a full house of happy people and one very happy little girl. I can't believe that she's already 2. I may still be in denial.

Mom things I can't live without - E-reader

Yes, that is right, an e-reader. In my case, my wonderful Nook Classic (I think? Back when there was only one option). I'm an avid reader and love to feel the weight of a good paperback beneath my fingers, feeling the woody and familiar scent fill my nose as each page turns, and see all my pretty covers lined up on the shelf.

Then, I had a kid. Even more importantly (for this particular item), I had a kid and was committed to breastfeeding her. Have you tried to breastfeed a newborn? It's an all day thing, and really not all that exciting once the novelty wears off. Add to it she had a horrible latch (I frequently called her my "crocodile child" and breastfeeding her wasn't puppies and rainbows and a walk in the park.

And pumping...boy did I love my Nook time while pumping. I would buy a few books and only allow myself to read while breastfeeding or pumping as a little extra incentive, and it did actually help. I was able to feed her until her 2nd birthday (assuming she doesn't self-wean in the next month) successfully.

Here's why. Breastfeeding requires hands, in my case, two hands. Many mom's are incredibly talented with one-handed breastfeeding, but I was not. I needed one hand to position me and one to position her and how was that going to work with a traditional book? It wasn't. However, I could lay my Nook on the arm of the couch I was sitting on and then just use a finger to flick the page, mucccch easier :)

Mom Things I can't live without - LifeHammer

I like to update my "mom things I can't live without post" also known as "things you should get for a new mom" every once in a while.

One new thing that has been added to this list is this, the Life Hammer .
I was given a LifeHammer as a gift from my grandparents, and thought it was more than a bit odd. It lived in our closet for a good 3 years. Then I had a kid and the need to keep someone else safe as well kicked in.

See, even though I doubt my car will ever be plunging into a lake, or caught in a flood (although with the way the weather has been lately, who knows), but I do anticipate needing this at some point.

Have you tried to get your kid out of a car seat in a hurry? It seems like those buckles and straps always stick at the worst moments. I get frustrated just trying to get her out to go to the grocery store, and her car seat is actually a really nice one (Graco MyRide 65, I highly recommend it). Now imagine being in a true emergency. Maybe  you were in a car accident, or the car flipped, or your child is choking/injured. Will you be able to be calm enough to fuss with the buckle? Probably not, hence, the LifeHammer and it's blade that easily slices through seat belts.

(And no, I'm not being compensated in any way, I just really think it is that important, probably the most important $15 you will ever spend if it is ever needed.